29 March 2010


I have to get this off my chest. The one thing that's really bothered me about this whole 'America' thing is it's lack of white vinegar packets in restaurants. I want vinegar for my fries. When I mention it down here people look at me as though I had 4 heads one of which was their own. It's not too difficult. They're like ketchup packets, but instead of ketchup inside it's white vinegar and it goes on french fries with some salt. It's how it's done America. Get a mitt and get in the damn game already!
That's all. Vinegar. Nuff said.

Next on the old agenda is the post-San Fran drive. It's a long way from San Fransisco to the Continent of Greater LA. So, it was a long day. There wasn't much stopping on the way except to eat in a town called Soledad. I was aiming to find an In & Out Burger joint (if you've never been to an In & Out burger joint, after people shake off the stunned look, they're so happy to tell you about how incredible In & Out Burger is... you'll have to wait for my review because...) but desperation led me to a Carl's Jr. (kinda confused as to why it's not Carl Jr's... I guess the burger is junior...? I dunno.) where, as is par for the course everywhere now, the entire team of customer service specialists were very eager to serve the drive through clientele and leave the sole human standing right in front of them to wait until they had a second. The burger was slightly better than the service. Fast food is fast food. All a variation on the same thing. To be honest, I dunno why I'm still talking about it.
Back on the road. At some point during the day I made an interesting discovery. It seems my speedometer is reading about 7mph faster than I'm actually going so, when I thought I was going 5 - 10 above the speed limit (the real speed limit) I was actually going the posted speed limit. This helped explain why I was always late on my days. That and the frequent coffee stops. And the lallygaggin.
I did not want to be pulling into the Greater LA area at night. I like being able to see when I don't know where the hell I am. approaching the Ventura/Camarillo area the highways began to get wider and the cars denser. The traffic wasn't too bad, there was just a lot of it. Eventually I arrived at my next victims' place (Colonel J's daughter Leah and her fiancee Derrick) and spent the evening chatting with them. They informed me that Ventura might be a good place for thrift stores...

...thrift stores eh...?


  1. Excellent update, leave the reader hangin'. You have a sense of drama, Trout. What am I saying, of course you know drama, you're a thespian fish after all. Silly Me.
    I await your next installment patiently. After all, "How poor are they that have not patience!"

  2. alas, tis purely a tale of rapidly diminishing hourglass sands that brought me to this abrupt ending yesternight. Today, with many errands in my purse, I venture fourth into the day in hopes of finding the bottomless hourglass or at very least more sand to add to mine own.
    Hark! There went some now! Well spent, but curse thee oily hoursand! Thou slip'st quickly and without remorse!
    I go!
    ...I go.